Naqib, this one goes to you! ;)

In 2005, my brother, Nabil got an offer to study medicine overseas. That was the exact moment when he inspired me so much to do well in my SPM (Malaysian Certificate of Education), get a scholarship and then thinking of studying medicine in the UK or Ireland. Personally, I have always wanted to give something really big as a gift to my parents, so I said to myself, lets get A star for all of my ten subjects as a gift to them.

Personally, with the help of Allah, I think I worked so hard. So so so hard until I slept like only 4-5 hours averagely and I did not even sleep during the day. I did not know how I survived in the class for the next day but alhamdulillah amazingly I did. Sometimes with the help of a picture of a guy I liked back in school, I became more awake then became more attentive during class. :P

Anyway, SPM exam passed and the results came out. Instead of getting 10 A stars, I got 9 A star and 1 B. To be honest, I was so sad  because I could not give my parents the gift I wanted them to have so badly.  I went back home, crying and sat in my room for the whole day. No one in the family had the courage to talk me.

But then, I said to myself. No, I could not stay sad forever. This will never change my SPM result. Believe in Allah, He did not give what I wanted because He wanted to give something that is much much much better. Since then I never look back. I took IB diploma and alhamdulillah here I am in Barts as a final year medical student. 

This personal experience made me reflected a lot on how I used to think, act and behave before when I was younger: 

1. Have the correct intention in doing everything. So in this SPM case, studying and sitting for the exam. 

: Do something not to please people around you but to please Allah.Only Him. 

2. Do not depend to your ability, but depend solely to Allah. 

: Depending on our ability will only make us lead a stressful life as there are things that are beyond control as they are within Allah's control. Change something that is within our control.

3. Allah will always give us what we need in life, not what we want.

: To be honest I actually so grateful that I went through this experience. This prove to me that how much you do or you work for something, in the end Allah will give you what He thinks the best for you, not what you think is the best for you because only Allah knows what we do not know.

4. The process of getting the outcome.is much more important than the outcome itself.

: All the process as in working so hard, helping out friend to do well in their studies, sitting for the exams, and most importantly, how my response on what happened. Alhamdulillah, these things have made myself today. 

5. A constant dua is very important as our effort. Dua is a subconscious thingy, do not leave it at the very  end.

: People always said, do your effort, then doa then tawakkal.But actually, I learned from an ustadh, he said that dua is something you do all the time. All the time. Not only after you finish with your effort. :) Allah even said, make dua to Me, I will answer them. ;)

So this post goes to my little brother, Naqib who is currently sitting for his SPM and also it is a reminder to myself to practise on things I know. Whatever happens in the future, embrace it and always see what we could learn out of it. So we will be more sabr and syukur in life, insyaAllah. 

Naqib, 

as your only sister, there is nothing more I have always wanted for you except whatever happen to you is the best  in the eye of Allah. So please do your best for your exam. I strongly believe that you have tried your best to revise and making dua to Allah. I wrote this with the hope to make you feel more confident to perform your best and convince you that is the crucial time for you to put your whole trust in Allah and He will absolutely decide what is the best for you. Make loadss of dua and I will always keep you and your friends in my dua too! :)

I love you loads. Study and jawap leklok okay?

Naqib, here are some tissues to wipe your tears while reading this, I know I am being extra sweet here :p. 

P/S: To you who are reading this, please make dua Allah will ease everything for my younger brother, his friends and all other SPM candidates. May Allah provide them the strength to do their best. Ameen!